Was this a year to remember, or forget? It began on an optimistic note, with Latinos having played a decisive role in the election.We hoped this political clout would lead to immigration reform, but the path to citizenship was longer than anybody thought. Momentum lagged over the summer, and there wasn’t much to celebrate during Hispanic Heritage Month. The government shutdown derailed the economic recovery and as the year came to a close everyone was getting cranky, including the editors of LATINO Magazine. But we’re still here, and we’re crankier than ever. Looking to 2014, we say, “Bring it on!” Before we pop the champagne corks, let’s remember what we want to forget, and not forget what we want to remember about 2013. Plus, our very own Cucaracha Awards.
Eric Garcia
Cuban
Young, charismatic, media-savvy Cuban American from Canada gets elected to the Senate with Tea Party support. But somewhere along the way, he lost his conscience and led the fight for a government shutdown that cost working Americans several billion dollars. He’s no stranger to hypocrisy or hyperbole, an immigrant who opposes immigration reform and compares Obama to Castro. But by ignoring the needs of the Latino community to fuel his own considerable ambition, he became a politician, in the worst sense of the word. Ted Cruz as a presidential candidate in 2016? The Democrats’ wet dream.
Cuban
Young, charismatic, media-savvy Cuban American from Miami gets elected to the Senate with Tea Party support. But somewhere along the way, he gained a conscience and led the fight for comprehensive immigration reform to bring millions of undocumented workers out from the shadows. He’s no stranger to controversy, having fibbed about his bio and gulped too much water on prime time. But by putting the needs of the Latino community ahead of his own considerable ambition, he became a statesman, in the best sense of the word. Marco Rubio as a presidential candidate in 2016? The Democrats’ worst nightmare.
Separated
at Birth
Losing your hair? Don’t sweat it, chicks dig shiny pates! Ask these two brothers from another mother,
Pitbull and Mini-Me
Party
They claimed to get it when Latinos self-deported from the Romney campaign. But a year later, the Republican brand is more tarnished than ever. According to a recent poll, only one in three Latinos said they felt closer to Republicans than Democrats, and 48% described the GOP with words like “intolerant” and “out of touch.”
Party
Business is booming at a resurgent U.S. Hispanic Chamber of Commerce led by CEO Javier Palomarez and Chairman Marc Rodriguez. There was much to celebrate at their annual convention, with Mayor Rahm Emanuel welcoming Latino business leaders from around the country to Chicago.
We’re not making this stuff up, amigos. In May, the Walt Disney Company filed with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to secure the phrase Dia de los Muertos. Apparently there’s a Pixar movie coming out about skeletons (can’t wait!) After an outcry from the Latino community, the entertainment giant swiftly withdrew the application. What’s next? Will MillerCoors try to to lock up Cinco de Mayo?
Pitch
There’s a reason Major League Baseball retired number 42, and it’s the withering fastball of Panamanian-born Yankee relief pitcher Mariano Rivera. A class act on and off the diamond, Rivera is baseball’s all-time leader in saves. The next time you’ll see number 42 will be in the Hall of Fame.
Pitch
Bacardi insulted all Cubans with a patronizing advertising campaign entitled ¡Vivimos! (We’re alive?) in which Señor Bacardi himself appears to launch Cuba’s
fight for independence against Spain by drinking rum with General Maceo. Imagine a beer commercial in which Paul Revere stops in a bar on his way to warn that the British are coming... coño, you get the picture.
AWARD
Bacardi insulted all Cubans with a patronizing advertising campaign entitled ¡Vivimos! (We’re alive?) in which Señor Bacardi himself appears to launch Cuba’s
fight for independence against Spain by drinking rum with General Maceo. Imagine a beer commercial in which Paul Revere stops in a bar on his way to warn that the British are coming... coño, you get the picture.
The carajo was the crow’s nest on a Spanish galleon where sailors were sent as punishment. That’s where we’d like to see Rep. Steve King, deep in an Iowa cornfield. He’s insulted our young people, our dogs, even our canteloupes. Bigoted buffoon who just doesn’t like us or Tea Party politico pandering to his base? ¿Que mas da?
Taco
Taco Bell has sold 600 million Doritos Locos Tacos, essentially a fake taco in a fake tortilla shell. Do gringos really eat this stuff?
Taco
Gilberto Ocañas and Victor Landa serve up a tasty selection of news from a Latino perspective online at NewsTaco.com
Trip
Senator Robert Menendez visited Santo Domingo in the private plane of campaign contributor Salomon Melgen and became entangled in a seedy scandal involving underage prostitutes that led to an FBI investigation.
Trip
Vice President Joe Biden emerged as a champion of U.S.-Mexico relations when he visited Mexico in September and met with President Enrique Peña Nieto and launched the High Level Economic Dialog with our closest neighbor.
Lawsuit
A federal judge dismissed a lawsuit filed by immigration agents who challenged President Obama’s Deferred Action program to stop the deportation of Dreamers.
Their lawyer was none other than Kris Kobach, Romney’s anti-immigrant immigration adviser.
Lawsuit
The Mexican American Legislative Caucus joined the Justice Departmnent in filing a lawsuit to overturn Texas’ restrictive voter ID law, which would require voters to present a government issued photo ID and unfairly impact poor people and minorities.
Sí Se Puede
No Se Puede
It was the Dreamers, undocumented young people brought to the U.S. by their parents, who fought the hardest for immigration reform this year and showed us all what it means to be an American.
It was Speaker John Boehner who shattered the hopes and dreams of millions of hard-working immigrants this year by not letting the Senate immigration reform bill be brought to a vote in the House.
Television Show
So here’s the pitch to the Lifetime Network: Let’s do a show about...Latina maids? Yep. One typical review called Devious Maids “an insulting disgrace...a tremendous disservice to the 20 million plus Latina female population in the U.S.” The only positive one I found noted that it’s “not as bad as we thought.”
Television Show
FX Network’s The Bridge featured Demian Bichir and Diane Kruger as detectives on opposite sides of the border chasing a serial killer. Latino screenwriters, sexy actors, and a plot pulled from the headlines made this noirish cop drama feel real and created a surprise hit.
Movie
If you laughed at Machete, you’ll laugh even harder at Machete Kills. Any movie with both Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen can’t be all bad. And if anyone can save this pinche world, it’s Danny Trejo. Bring on the sequel!
Movie
Machete Kills, the follow-up to Machete, is like a bad joke that’s even less funny once you’ve heard it. Any movie with both Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen is trying too hard. And can Danny Trejo really save the world? Please, no more sequels!